Question posted by Kandi of Twin-spiration on Multiples and more
(Kandi has beautiful 6 year old indentical twin girls)
The question posted on the site...
Do you have one on one time with your twins and if so what do you do? Do you feel guilty not being with the other one and how often do you do one on one time? We have tried it many time but enjoy being together with all of us better. I do think it's important to have that one on one time but am not sure where to go or what to do and how long and how often to do them.
My thoughts to Kandi's question:
I have 6 year old fraternal twins (1 boy and 1 girl) and another 3 year old daughter. Both my husband and I work (though I reduced my hours at work last October)so time is tight and we do tend to do lots together as a family. We also love camping and getting out and about in the summer so that again tends to be time we spend together as a family.
Your photos look great and you all look happy, healthy and connected as a family so whatever you are doing is obviously working
That being said we do from time to time have 1-1 time, girls days, boys days, quick trips to the shops etc and I think the option for that increases as they get older. It is probably easier for us because of the gender difference as my twins have very different interests.
We haven't done it for a while and the older 2 did suggest it the other day - so perhaps your girls have a view?
However, with your girls being in different classes (something I think is important for all sorts of reasons) are you finding that they are being invited to different parties / social activities? This could be the perfect time to enjoy some individual time in a natural way.
I found that when my twins were babies I did feel guilty on focusing on one more than the other and then I realised that actually I was focussing on which ever baby needed that input at the time (be it illness, development etc). It also seemed to even out in the end.
I think it is also very easy to feel guilty about choices that we make as a parent and I think that that is a shame as most parents are doing a great job. Did the previous generation worry so much I wonder?